Happy (almost) Valentine’s Day! In the spirit of this holiday I’m writing a fun post on how to survive marriage to a Type A wife. Disclaimer: I’m neither a marriage nor relationship expert. In fact, my husband is the only man I’ve had a long term (over 1 year) relationship with! These are just some observations I’ve made about myself and marriage over the past few years. I hope you have some fun with it!
Let’s just get this out there…I am a Type A wife. To be completely honest, I really do enjoy a lot of the personality traits that make me Type A, like my competitive drive, discipline to succeed, and how considerate I am of my loved ones. This temperament, however, doesn’t always make for the most harmonious home. Here are a few things to know about us Type A wives:
1. WE LOVE BEING IN CONTROL, AND THAT’S NOT GOING TO CHANGE!
So here’s the thing, Type A’s crave order and would create a plan to account for every minute of the day, if only time allowed! It’s because we are very uncomfortable with uncertainty, and excessive free time, which can seem like we’re not being productive (another obsession of alphas). Fortunately, most Type A wives realize that we can’t control everything, especially one married for more than a week, or has kids. Here’s a little secret: we want to be in control in every area of our lives, BUT NOT IN OUR MARRIAGE! Most of us are bossy babes (cue Kelis’ I’m Bossy soundtrack), but we want our husbands to lead. The trick is to provide us with some much needed balance, but come armed with a solid plan! Type A wives are more likely to release the reigns of control when we see a well though out plan from the hubs. Greg knows there’s a stronger chance I’ll be agreeable to one of his proposals when he already has the answers to the questions he knows I’m gonna ask.
2. TYPE A WIVES LOVE ATTENTION, SO GIVE IT TO US
All women love attention. Heck, everyone loves attention! But what I’m talking about here is attentiveness. Pay real attention to us, SEE us! Sure, I love it when Greg says “oh, that’s a hot outfit”, or when he ogles me when I’m sauntering around our bedroom sans clothes. What really gets me googly eyed about him though, is when I see him making an effort to anticipate my needs, and fulfill them. That tells me he’s been listening to me, which in turn makes me feel valued by him. It’s especially important for a Type A wife to feel valued by her husband, that all of our efforts to make our family life perfect, matter to him too.
3. KNOW WHEN TO HOLD ‘EM, KNOW WHEN TO FOLD ‘EM, KNOW WHEN TO WALK AWAY…
I won’t finish the line to that Kenny Rogers’ song. Even though most Type A wives have a little ‘crazy’ in us, hopefully there’s no running away from us! I saved this one for the last because it’s just something husbands will have to learn over time. With lots and lots of patience, and consistent practice of the above, husbands of Type A wives can learn when to leave us be, when to “check” us, and when to hold us down. And hopefully we’re not making it too hard for them by giving them cues when they get it right.
There’s no doubt that marriage is hard, no matter your personality trait. And none of the above will matter if you both don’t want to be together and aren’t willing to fight for what you have.
Did you enjoy this post? Drop a comment below, let me know your thoughts! I’d love to hear about any marriage observations/tips you’d like to share too.
Live FEARLESS, one fashionable moment at a time